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Mr Man
 
There was a girl and every time she screams the hole world shakes.

One day the girl wanted to go and have a shower
with her dad. He said, "No","I'll scream!!", said
the girl, "Ok", replied dad.

In the shower the girl said, "Whats that?", pointing to her dads dick, "You don't need to know", replied dad, "I'll scream"
"Ok it's Mr Man"

When they were finished having a shower
dad was in bed. The girl said to her dad, "Can I
come in bed with you?" "No!!" said dad
"I'll scream" Ok you can"

In the middle of the night the girl said, "Can I
play with Mr Man?" "No!!" said dad in a husky voice, "I'll scream!!" "Ok you can"

Next morning dad woke up and said, "Why am I in hospital?",the girl said, "Mr Man spat at me so I bit his head off.
 
Old granny

A little old lady went to the grocery store and put the most
expensive cat food in her basket. She then went to the check
out counter where she told the check out girl. "Nothing but the
best for my little kitten. "The girl at the cash register said, "I'm
sorry, but we cannot sell you cat food without proof that you
have a cat. A lot of old people buy cat food to eat, and the
management wants proof that you are buying the cat food for
your cat." The little old lady went home, picked up her cat and
brought it back to the store.

One Cat

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( T )
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`. ; .'
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They sold her the cat food.

The next day, the old lady went to the store and bought 12 of
the most expensive dog cookies -- one for each day of
Christmas. The cashier this time demanded proof that she
now had a dog, claiming that old people sometimes eat dog
food. Frustrated she went home, came back and brought in
her dog.

One Doggie

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She was then given the dog cookies.

The next day she brought in a box with a hole in the lid. The
little old lady asked the cashier to stick her finger in the hole.
The cashier said, "No, you might have a snake in there." The
little old lady assured her that there was nothing in the box
that would bite her. So the cashier put her finger into the box
and pulled it out and told the little old lady, "That smells like
crap."

The little old lady grinned from ear to ear, "Now, my dear, can
I please buy three rolls of toilet paper?"

Never fool around with a Little old lady:
 
Can't be a two way parking
One day a boy went in the shower with his dad.
The boy asked, "Whats that?",pointing to his dad's dick, "It's a limo", said dad.

Next day the boy went in the shower with his mum,
"Whats that?" asked the boy pointing to her fanny, "It's my garage son", said mum.


Next night they were in bed. Dad said, "Son move over,dads gonna park the limo in the garage"
the boy replies,"But dad I already parked my porch in there.
 
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